Manliness

Some surprises are good.  Like when all the lights are green on your way to work, or when a call to Telkom ran smoothly, or, on the topic of today, when you watch a movie that you’ve seen before but it’s a lot better the second time around.

Movie in question, You’ve got Mail.  Ok, don’t stop reading, just give me a second to explain…  

I saw the movie originally a few years ago, what, maybe ten years?  More probably.  Anyway, I didn’t like it when I first saw it and while everyone made a fuss about it, I thought it was very disappointing.  But I was an eejit back then, except that I didn’t know it.

Anyway, watched it reluctantly a few days ago.  (The thing about doing things reluctantly is that you generally are surprised at how not-so-bad it ends up being.)  And yes, was impressed by this romcom – because it is totally different from the typical romcom which I have come to loathe.  Also displays some serious manliness by Tom Hanks, and when I think about it, I actually really like this guy in most movies, a great actor, and he does have a serious bout of manliness about him.  Motivation to follow.

First a footnote re romcoms.  Used to love them.  Used to be my favourite kind of movie in fact (I was in my mid-20s ok, give me a break).  Anyway, have come to loathe them because they are so far removed from reality it sickens me.  It’s the characterisation that puts me off.  Men aren’t manly and women aren’t feminine – often the reverse is encouraged.  Anyway, not all romcoms are bad, but mostly these days, they are.

On the other hand, there are a few romcoms or similar type of movies out there that are really good. 

Anyway, why I liked You’ve got Mail so much this time around (and by this statement I’m more saying that there’s something particular that I liked, not necessarily everything in the movie) – I was so impressed by the actual story, or the impressive part of the story anyway.  Two people are in an email relationship (dial-up internet is painful to watch and rest of technology also atrocious but hey, it was the 90s) and they pretty much fall in love through this medium (ok, another footnote here, people often fall in love if their only mode of communicado is the written form; it’s very easy to put your best foot forward all the time and seem like an incredibly gifted, awesome and good-hearted kind of person and, looks aside, it’s real hard to spot the guy who yells in traffic and makes belching chomping slurping noises while eating which is an abomination if you ask me).  For whatever reason however, it seems to work for them this relationship and it works in the movie etc, although this is not the part that impressed me per se. 

The good part of the plot – both of them end up meeting each other in real life without knowing that they’re each other’s pen pals, and they hate each other in real life.  Loathing occurs.  Tom ends up putting Meg out of business and she hates his guts etc etc, while in the meantime, blissfully unaware of their identities, they carry on with the pen pal business and confide in one another and become more and more convinced that the other person is their soul mate, and in real life they are hostile enemies.  Ok, that is great plotting right there.

So on the day when Tom the pen pal finally realises that Meg, his prime enemy, is also his beloved pen pal, he does a little flip out, naturally – yes, it comes as a major shock.  And this is where it gets good – he overcomes his prejudice.  And then he humbly manoeuvres himself into her life, while she is still loathing him and not aware that he is the pen pal guy.  He actually becomes her friend.  That is goooooood.  In her realm, he moves from being her worst nightmare, to her best friend.  And he actually succeeds in that.  There’s this awkward scene where he comes to visit her while she’s sick (and she’s just lost her business which was a direct result of his opening a massive bookstore three seconds away from her cute and quaint one), and she clearly doesn’t want him there and makes numerous hints for him to leave, and he simply doesn’t leave.  Instead, he gives her flowers and nurses her while she’s dishing out insults. 

That’s good stuff man, I like it.  Him being all manly and stuff.  He sacrifices his own ego and gently helps her to stop insulting him which they both know will only leave her with regret at her involuntary rudeness.  She eventually gives in to the friendship as he keeps on bumping into her, succumbing to his genuine interest.  Like him, her heart turns 180 degrees towards him and now she finds herself torn between her pen pal and her former chief enemy, now best friend.  The end is of course very predictable but it’s the plot that makes this movie so great.  And the evidence of real manliness making its debut in a romcom – what a novel idea. 

This is very much like what I read in the Bible concerning the Creator’s advice, the only truth really, about marriage, and particularly what he says to the guys – “husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her… so that he might present the church to himself in splendour, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing…”  And I think that is exactly what Tom did for Meg.  He got over himself and suffered her insults and rejection while helping her to overcome her prejudice, just as he had to do.  Well done Tom!  This is what I call handsomeness.   

(Ok, and I do like the fact that he has a dog in the movie.  Men usually have dogs for either one of two reasons – one, they don’t trust people so they invest in man’s best friend, or, two – they’re incredibly responsible.*  Obviously the latter applies in this case.  Also doesn’t hurt that he has a boat in the movie.)

Great story.  Sorry that I’d been calling it mediocre all this time.  I see the magic now.  Well done everyone involved.  Especially Nikolaus Laszlo, the writer of the novel, The Shop Around The Corner, on which the movie is based.

*Ok, I totally made that up.  Although it makes sense right?