Well all you need to know is that the first of the series was definitely not worth posting. So here is part 2, generally aiming to be intelligent and funny and add value to the reader’s life and to the all-round wellbeing of society at large.
You know that it almost never occurs to me to have a cup of tea? Often I find that I’m somewhat dissatisfied. Not severely, but somewhat. Much the same as a dripping tap – you don’t even notice how much it bothers you and a few hours later you cannot rationally explain why you had a lash-out at the stapler for running out of staples because man oh man…. that. is. irritating! And I think that must be the reason – the fact that I continually deprive myself of life’s simple pleasures such as an afternoon cup of tea.
Just so you know, when I say lash-out, I mean it like an implosion. Because that’s how I do it. Always have. I don’t know why. Won’t make a peep, you can steal my pencil (my special pencil!!!), change the height of my chair, cut in front of me in the queue, take my last gum, cut off my pony tail – I tell you, not a peep. My cheeks will just get a little more colour and a teardrop will go sit in the corner of my eye. That is how my implosion looks from the outside. Sometimes, in severe cases, my lower lip will start a hesitant quiver.
The inside is a different matter altogether. Think complete nuclear meltdown. Ok, I don’t really know what nuclear has to do with anything but I think those two words should always go together, occasionally interrupted by a full stop, for effect. Nuclear. Meltdown.
But don’t worry folks, mostly I think I have a hold on this implosion thing by now. It’s all about forgiveness. Changed my life. No jokes. I was just making conversation earlier. Hehe, no need for us to get awkward on account of an empty stapler… But seriously, it never ceases to surprise me when that thing runs empty. I don’t know why. After a decade in the office you’d think I’d be used to it.
So yes, intelligence. Actually, I think I’m ready to do a whole teaching on wisdom. Although my presentation always seem to lack intensity because normally when I say something devastatingly brilliant people think I made a joke and laugh instead of going – “wohah… my brain hurts from listening to all that intellect…” Actually, the teaching won’t be about me saying wise things, it would be more about wisdom itself and how to get it and why it is called wisdom in the first place and also, there’s a little secret about wisdom that I don’t know if people have discovered it but it’s really kind of priceless and I’m quite shocked that not more people mention it more often… But you’ll have to come to the teaching if you want to know more. Ha. Who’s laughing now?
Ok, so I actually have to go now because I have a meeting later and I have some stuff to do, yes, important things of course… But it was nice to bump into you again after some time of deathly silence and the funniness, value and all-round wellbeing will have to be postponed until we meet again. Or until I write again. Because really, this is all just me doing the work or sometimes it feels like that in our relationship…
Ok, I didn’t really mean that. I see what you do and how you're reading this.
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